Physics Games and Physics-Based Game Downloads

I Hate Clowns: Let Pie Gones Be Pie Gones

Friday, February 24th, 2006 by Matthew in Physics Games,Virtools
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (Rate this game! 89 votes, average: 3.16 out of 5)

I Hate Clowns is a fun little game we developed in the Fall of 2003. It was the run-up to the Independent Games Festival deadline. Along with Beesly’s Buzzwords, we decided to submit whatever projects we had playable at the time. I Hate Clowns was created in the spare time of a very busy three days. The game is a little rough, as a result–the artistic production borderlines on placeholder. The fun is all there, though, so we decided to post it online for the world to enjoy.

Die Clowns, Die

The premise of I Hate Clowns is simple: You throw metal pies at clowns who are being inexplicably launched into the air like skeet shoot targets. You have a limited number of metal pies with which to brutalize these poor entertainers. Take it, clowns!

I Hate Clowns is a physics game in a very pure sense. Except for the scoring, the rest of the game mechanics rest on the physics engine: the ragdoll clowns, the metal pies, the physical dimensions of the playfield, etc. If we ever revisit the project it would be easy to extend the gameplay by designing more complicated playfields with various physics contraptions.


Hitting an airborne clown, before he touches the ground, is worth 10 points. Each subsequent pie that smashes that clown before he meets the earth is worth an air combo of 2 points. All hits after that are ground hits and worth 1 point. It is possible for one pie to bounce between multiple targets and rack up multiple points.

Level Progression

Despite the simplistic scoring mechanic, there is some flexibility to changing the player experience. In the early levels most players learn to fire as many pies as possible as fast as possible. This usually results in the wailing akin to the moans of a thousand clowns. Later levels, though, play with the variables. Some levels severely limit pie count and require enough accuracy to pull off air combos at will. One level, “The Saddest Clown”, gives you 50 pies and a high point goal, but with only one clown (who truly becomes the saddest clown of all). There are 47 levels in total.

The Player Experience

Our goal with the game was to avoid complicated game mechanics and required learning curves. Instead, we just wanted the player to have fun and laugh a little. The sounds inch up to insanity, each level name is a terribly horrible pun, and we play a little with time scaling by slowing some levels down and speeding up others. The end result is the game is fun to just pick up and play for a few minutes. No explanation needed.

I Hate Clowns Screenshot Screenshot of Physics Games
(I Hate Clowns Game Screenshots)

Play Free, Online!

The game is available to play right in your web browser with the Virtools Web Player. If you already have the player installed, the game is ~800k. Otherwise you’re looking at a few MB install beforehand. Check out the landing page for the game right here.

Mile Pie Club

I Hate Clowns was a fun project that took well under 10 hours to crank out. It certainly won’t make us any money; I’d be surprised if anyone would be willing to pay for something this sparse. Still, it’s a hoot to play and a great way to kill time when you should be working (especially if you should be working on games). It’s also a great way to kill clowns. Enjoy!

Play I Hate Clowns online here (800k)

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4 Responses to 'I Hate Clowns: Let Pie Gones Be Pie Gones'

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  1. Pie man said,

    on February 24th, 2006 at 10:22 pm

    Best. Game. Ever.

  2. PoV said,

    on February 25th, 2006 at 9:27 am

    I’m going to have nightmares all week from that.

  3. on March 3rd, 2006 at 6:32 am

    Today’s Time Waster: I Hate Clowns

  4. ShaggE said,

    on October 21st, 2006 at 8:20 pm

    I love the title for Round 47 :P Fun game.

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